Let me preface this by saying this was a free ebook, so it's not like I held great expectations, Pip.
I couldn't finish it. I tried, I really did. I made it up to 70%.
There are grammar issues and incomplete sentences. The dialogue is very stilted and the writing in general is confusing.
Don't tell me a character is a tough person who never cries and then immediately have her sobbing next, that's not how it works. I know it's a novella and there's limited space, but I feel like there was enough room to show her as tough, beforehand, in order for her crying to actually have some impact. You know what, though? That doesn't even matter, because the characters' reactions are all over the place anyway. At least up to where I quit.
And what's up with all the hissing? Is the MC secretly an angry cat? Once or twice is okay, but she does it several times for no good reason that I could find.